february reflection, march intentions

I love the beginning of a new month. And the middle. And the end - but there's something new and shiny and special about the beginning. I was reading Jacki Carr's latest blog post, and I got the idea to do some reflection and intention setting for February and March. I've found that any type of journaling - from taking the time to write in my notebook, blogging, scribbling on sticky notes, doodling - helps me to find clarity and focus in on what I want to create.

The two things I’m most proud of from February are:

1.  Making the time to put real work into my personal blog. I’ve been keeping up with posting, and even added a new section called get to know the guru – an inspirational interview series – that I’m super stoked about. Ch-ch-check it out you guys!
2. Tuning in and really listening to what I personally want and need, rather than what I think I should – or what I think others think I should – want and need. Let me tell you, it’s easier said than done. Truly a practice that I have to work on each and every day. #selflove

The two things I’m most grateful for from February are:

1. My people. My tribe. My hearts. I wouldn’t be able to be off on this crazy, wild adventure without all of these people around the world to support me – I couldn’t do it alone. Don’t think I’ve forgotten about you, because I haven’t. I think about y’all every damn day.
2. Connection. In every form – hugs from strangers at Wanderlust, evenings watching the sunset with someone I just met at my hostel that very afternoon, FaceTime with family and friends. Even small talk! I have met so many amazing people from all over the world – seriously, all over! And I’ve been able to stay in touch with all those who matter most back at home. Full heart.

The lesson I learned and am carrying forward with me from February is:

Buckle up, lean in, listen and learn. I’ve learned so much by being vulnerable and being present to all of it – the loneliness, the homesick pangs, the uncertainty, the excitement – and I have grown and learned so much along the journey.

My intention for March is:

S-l-o-w down. Enjoy. Play. Simply be. Take it all in, let it marinate. I’m so used to moving at light speed and having a packed schedule that I sometimes think the hustle is the only way there is – but it’s not! I don’t want to speed through this incredible part of my life.

One thing I am to do every day in March is:

Journal. Journal about what’s working, what isn’t working, what I’m grateful for, etc. It’s a great creative outlet for me and it helps me to work things out and reflect.

Because I am brave, here are two new/scary things I will do in March:

1. I will meet and have lunch or coffee or yoga date with (at least) three new people.
2.  I am renting a car and going on a mini-road trip by myself on the South Island. Watch out Kiwis, I’m not used to driving on the left side of the road! You’ve been warned. #tourist

The one book I definitely want to read in March is:

Adventures For Your Soul by Shannon Kaiser.

Just for fun, I will…

Pick up a hitchhiker. (Don’t tell my mom or dad! Especially not my big brother…heh)

As an act of intentional kindness, I will…

Practice the radical self love that I so rarely give myself.

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And that's me! What about you guys? What is March bringing up for y'all? 

be kind, always. (please)

Yesterday at work (as most of you know I am currently at lululemon athletica ) I struck up conversation with another guest that was looking at pants. I had all these stories in my head of how it could be - I always prepare myself for worst case scenario so I'm not thrown off and move into reaction, rather than responding. I guess you could say it's my little resilience ritual. I don't want to say that I was surprised when I was met with a pleasant response, because that would give off the idea that I have lost faith in humanity and assume the worst in everyone I meet, which is not the case at all, but I was caught slightly off guard. Anyhoo...

It started as a typical conversation. I asked him what he was looking for, and I helped him track down what he needed. And then we got started talking about hockey, and it turned into what seemed like a 20 minute conversation. Not to take away the importance of the words that were exchanged, but I've already forgotten the specifics of what was said. That's not what I'll remember, it's the feeling I was left with. It's that he made eye contact with me, he listened to what I was saying, he treated me like an equal - he saw me as another human being, not just as the random Asian girl at the yoga pants store who rang him up. I felt respected, I felt valued.

And as he left he said, "Happy Holidays!" which is seemingly insignificant, but put a huge smile on my face and easily was the highlight of my day. He didn't have to say it - we had said our goodbyes and he was nearly out the door, but he did. How just plain kind and lovely.

This got me thinking. How many times have I not seen the person standing in front of me - the barista, the server, the person bagging my groceries, the person sitting next to me at the coffee shop? So many times, unfortunately. We talked about this in yoga teacher training, the fact that we tend to reduce people to these labels that help us to categorize people, to make sense of them. But I've come to realize that in doing so we dehumanize them - we don't see them for who and what they truly are: another human being - with feelings, needs, desires, hopes, dreams, insecurities and so on and so forth. And it's not personal - actually, it's exactly the opposite, it's about as impersonal as it gets. I'm not saying this is necessarily good or bad, it's just something that deserves awareness.

Although I may not always be aware when I'm doing this myself, I certainly can pick up on when it's happening to me. And as anyone who has experienced it knows, it does not feel good. No, not at all. And I don't ever want to be the reason someone's good day turns sour, or questions their own worth, or has a bade taste in their mouth or a pit in their stomach (this is very I am/you are, but that's a whole other topic.) I want to be the person who leaves everyone that walks into my presence feeling a little lighter and happier than when they left.

Of course, this isn't a switch that I can just flip on or off. It's a practice. It's a conscious choice to choose empathy, compassion and above all else kindness - which for me, is not always my gut reaction. It's taking the time to respond rather than react. It's a shift from attitude to gratitude. It's the courageous decision to say, "I see you and I hear you." It's saying hell yes to connection. And these aren't always gut reactions for me, but they're choices that I am wholeheartedly ready, willing and committed to making.

Happy holidays, you guys. Namaste!

twenty three

Another year, another opportunity to reflect, ground myself and be grateful.

Hol-eeeeee-cow. 23. When do you start feeling your age? I'm curious - and I seriously would like an answer. I feel like each year I get older with the expectation of feeling wiser and well, older, but it never comes. It's always at bay. I still feel like my mind has miles to go to catch up with the magical number that seems to increase more and more rapidly as time goes on. Oy.

In honor of another trip around the sun, I've got a list of 23 important life lessons that my arguably short time on this earth has taught me:
 

1. Hangovers get worse with age. Unfortunately...
2. We don't meet anyone by accident and people come into our lives for a reason.
3. Similarly, there's no such thing as coincidence.
4. With everything, do it with passion or not at all.
5. Creating a vision for your life is a must. It lays the groundwork to live intentionally.
6. The small things are everything.
7. Don't take yourself too seriously. I mean it.
8. Life is short, always say yes to pizza.
9. Regret nothing - learn from it and let it go with grace.
10. Netflix is a gift from the gods.
11. Never take the easy way out.
12. Love with everything you have - a broken heart or bruised ego is better than playing it safe.
13. Find good people and never let them go.
14. Anything - and I mean anything - is possible.
15. Love yourself first and everything else will fall into place.
16. Success has nothing to do with money.
17. It's better to projectile word vomit than to not say anything at all.
18. Just say no to passive aggression.
19. Never turn down an opportunity for adventure.
20. Failure is a must.
21. Be kind. I cannot not stress this one enough.
22. Drive like you stole it.
23. There will never be anyone as fabulous, fierce, perfect or all-around amazing as Beyonce. Nope. Never.

Bring it on, 23. I'm ready for ya.

that full moon though

We've all--perhaps tirelessly--heard the phrase "enjoy the little things" or a similar adaptation. Well, the little things are the best. Seriously. I've loved that saying ever since the first time I laid eyes on it, but I don't think I truly put it into practice or appreciated its true 'essence,' if you will, until now. It only took me 22 years and moving to a new town in a another state where I didn't know a soul.

When you're constantly living and breathing outside of your comfort zone, you begin to notice things you probably wouldn't have noticed otherwise or that you constantly take for granted. The other night I was walking home from a night out on the town and I couldn't help but ogle over the full moon. Sure, I've seen countless full moons, but that night I really couldn't a.) stop talking about it, b.) stop staring at it or c.) stop smiling. I mean I had this huge, toothy grin on my face and I was blabbing about it for the whole walk home--my friend must have wanted to duct tape my mouth shut or just completely knock me out. Oh, and don't even get me started on those stars. It was like I had never seen either of them before. The reason why I'm even writing about this now is that I truly don't remember the last time I took the time to look up at a starry sky and appreciate its beauty. It was breathtaking.

The next day when I woke up, I still had those damn stars and full moon on my mind. This got me to thinking about all of those other things that I may have been missing out on or not fully appreciating, and the list I came up with was truly infinite: The check-in texts from friends and family, people smiling as we pass on a trail or on the streets, the baristas at Peach's asking for--and proceeding to remember--my name, a good book, my brother offering to pick me up from the airport, etc.

Although small, when strung together these seemingly tiny things evolve into one big, continuous streak of happy. An endless supply of warm fuzzies--and who doesn't want that, right? Sometimes I get caught up in looking for those grand gestures that will take my breath away or flip my world upside down, but really they may never happen and that's just not a sustainable way to enjoy life.

The little things are happening all the time, everywhere you turn, you just have to be paying enough attention to see them. The choice is yours.

anywhere but here

I've started to realize what I thought was one of my biggest strengths is actually one of my biggest weaknesses: multitasking. My mom has scolded me on multitasking since I was in junior high, but I've always rolled my eyes and continued doing my homework, while watching TV, while texting and checking my Facebook, for example. Welp, here I am however many years later and I'm finally seeing that Mom was right...as usual. When I'm on a hike or at yoga, I think about what I'm going to eat after I work out (but really, when am I not thinking about what I'm going to eat next?) When I'm at work, I think about what I'll be doing once I get off. When I'm at home watching TV, I'm doing work and sending emails. When I'm out to dinner with friends or family, I'm constantly checking my phone. I stop paying attention for what seems like a second and when I finally snap back into the moment, I realize that I've missed so much more than that. When did I realize this was a problem for me? When I got so caught up in what I'll be doing in a year from now that I forgot to enjoy my new home...ASPEN. How stupid is that? I know, I kind of want to slap me too. This is no bueno, people. No bueno at all. I'm missing out on things that are happening right here, right now, and wasting my time worrying about things that haven't even happened or that might not even happen at all. W T F.

They say the first step is admitting you have a problem...

Well, in an effort to not miss out anymore of my life, I'm making a commitment to just be present. It might sound simple, but it's something that doesn't come easy for me. Whether I'm watching TV, at work or on the phone with the fam, I'm going to be all there. I refuse to miss out on anything else. There is a time and a place for everything, and that time and place is not while I'm already doing something else (that sounded really great in my head, but I'm not so sure now that I've written it down...) Feel free to call me out on this if you notice me not staying true to my commitment, in fact, please do.

Well, here goes nothing. Cheers to being present, people, because all we have is now.
 

choose to see the good stuff

How much happier do you think we'd all be if we just shifted the way we looked at things? At the world?

Yesterday, I stood in line and couldn't help but eavesdrop on a father and daughter standing behind me. They bitched and moaned for probably 20 minutes--if not 30 or 40 (the line was reaaally long.) They complained about the buses not coming early, they complained about what people were--or weren't--wearing, they complained about how many people there were, and the list goes on. Honestly, it's a much shorter list to tell you what they didn't complain about than what they did.

Usually this kind of thing would affect my mood and I myself would start to complain and point out all the things that were wrong in that very moment--but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I was going to have fun, god damnit. The sun was shining, I was spending some quality time with two of my favorite people and was about to hop on a bus to one of the most beautiful spots in Aspen. And then there's the simple fact that we're in Aspen--one of the most beautiful places in the world. What the hell is there to be miserable about? Nothing.

In the grand scheme of things, nothing these two people were complaining about matter even the slightest, but they let it. I realized that instead of reporting back to their loved ones about how perfect the weather was, how beautiful the scenery was or how much fun they had with each other, they would probably talk about everything they had been complaining about all morning--and that made me sad.

This got me thinking...

I really do have control over my life. I have choice--I always have choice. I can choose to take on the negative emotions and feelings of people around me--or other things I cannot control--and let it ruin my day, or not. My happiness is just that--mine--and it doesn't have to depend on other peoples'.

Piggybacking off of that learning, the second takeaway I have from this experience is that we really must choose to see the good stuff. You might think it sounds stupid, but that's probably just because you haven't actually given it a try. It's a small, simple shift that could change your entire life. Seriously. We can pick out all the things that drive us off our rockers and be miserable for the rest of our lives, or--even in the presence of those not-so-great things--we can choose happiness and see something good. It's really that simple.